digging to china

by lillythehtcat

as long as i can remember..any time anyone dug a hole in the yard..deeper than a cats tail..someone would come along and say..what are you doing..digging to china.  i dont know what made me think about that..maybe recently watching some people plant bushes..i was hoping they would flush out a few chippys.  anyway..deep throat and i were talking about stocking the gift shop and how we would probably have to get a lot of stuff from china.

and then..

i had..what i thought was my most brilliant idea ever…deep throat and i..in our spare time..could dig a hole..supply tunnel..to china…think what we could save on shipping..if we kept this thing quiet we could avoid customs…yeah..i know..you are absolutely kicking yourselves right now saying..marge..why the hell didnt i think of that.

can you imagine how simple this would work…say we are running low on lillys famous cheesy bits…you walk over to the hole..supply tunnel..and holler down..hey.. almost out of cheesy bits..and the people in china..at the other end..shoot up a case of cheesy bits…thats what corporate america calls just-in-time inventory.

so i said to deep throat..round-up some shovels we are about to revolutionize global supply chain management.  dt says dont you think we ought to see where in china we are going to pop out.  ok..occasionally deep throat has a good idea..so we get on google earth..zoom in on the gift shop site and record the latitude and longitude..i do a little simple math..it is definitely not deep throats strong suit..well we do the math..zoom around to the other side of the world and………..we pop out in the middle of….the indian ocean..what..

all my life ive heard..what are you doing..digging to china. you couldnt look at a simple globe and see you were opposite the indian ocean..what about the china syndrome..

you want to know why your high schoolers are 28th in math..right behind latvia..18th in reading comprehension.  finland..by the way..was first..i didnt even know finland had a language..sounded like they were grunting at each other.

kids are dumb here because they are getting their education from the back of a happy meal box and you adult people are telling them stupid crap like..what are you doing..digging to china.

looks like we will have to get our inventory from east nashville…